Set The Table

take a seat

Set the Table .

The Woman.  Is considered.  Calm.  Kind.  Knows when to rest.  Plans carefully her moves.  Her steps.  Her time.

The Little Girl. Wants to continuously play.  She dances.  Whirling in the want.  Spinning endlessly in dizzy circles.  

The Teen Girl.  Is rebellious.  Angry.  Defiant.  Unstable in her steps.   She spits at the world.  Disguises her pain as fierce independence – but she has not yet arrived.

The BOy.  Full of wonder.  Feels truth.  Sees truth through the veil of lying stories which renders him confused and restrained in the muddle.  

The Teen BOy.  Feels the world like a rash.  A responsibility to save and fix.  His mind forever grinding.  He is heavy.  Burdened. Drenched in angst.

The Man.  Knows his responsibility.  And what is not.  He stands firm in role.  Is comfortable with the soft.  The tenderness.  The knowing.

Now they come together through the collide.  The tumble.  The wrestle for a place.

Then enters another two….The Father who holds the lid.  Mother, who holds the strings.  And the struggle becomes the child.

It will be the recognition that brings all to the table.  The cleverness of a Jester to hold the juggle.  The Woman who sets them all a place.

Art Helen Smithson titled, ‘A flood of Light Streams In’, from book, ‘Bed 29 and Other Stories’ by Guy de Maupassant who died 6th July, 1893 after a, “Period of semi-madness”, they say.  Find in Clunk and Jam book.

Footnote:  Written 17th August, 2010.  Relationships are complicated – particularly the relationships between all of our many selves. 

I think growing up is not so much a process of leaving behind our little girl or boy selves and becoming a singular something else – adult/parent, man/woman.  I think we continue to house all developmental ages, their behaviours and their attachments to past experiences – which can then play out in how we react and relate to what’s going on around us as adults.  As an adult, the trick is to be able to identify who’s doing the reacting.  And if it’s the little girl or boy or the angry teenager, be able to call on the adult (man/woman) to protect, settle, reassure, resolve and guide.  To help our little vulnerable person inside see and feel differently.

This happens through the little girls and boys who arrive on my page.  They show up to be seen and heard.  By being able to ‘see’ them (drawing) and ‘hear’ them (writing), I can help them feel better – mostly by calling on the woman/adult to help them work things out.  In any given situation it’s about asking yourself who’s doing the reacting?  Little boy/little girl?  Teen boy/teen girl?  Protective parent (often angry and blinded)?  And then calling on the man or woman to take control.  It’s surprising how quickly things can change when we swap hats.



More on this topic by Paul Bloom coming…

“Each of each is a community of competing selves, with the happiness of one causing the misery of another.

 Within each brain, different selves are continually popping in and out of existence.”  Paul Bloom

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