November 25, 2020 - A Caring Approach



“If you’re depressed or anxious, you’re not weak and you’re not crazy — you’re a human being with unmet needs,” Hari says.  Johann Hari’s book, ‘Lost Connections’ and resource website.  See Black Dog’s Links page for support contacts.

IMPORTANT: If you’re on medication, do not stop without discussing with a health professional.


And a personal story reflecting a more caring approach, ‘Tread Carefully In Mind’ (written 2007).


November 25, 2020 - A Hand In Loss


One desperate morning, however, I did the most simple of things and perhaps this can help you with the loss of your wife, and your brother, more than my words. I sat by myself, in a quiet space, and called upon my son by name. I closed my eyes and imagined lifting him from my heart — this tormented place in which I was told he lived — and I positioned him outside of my body, next to me, beside me. I said, “You are my son and now you are beside me.” These few words had a powerful, vibrational effect, and this simple act of imagination was the first step in a process that would eventually lead me back to the world. By performing this act I was temporarily released from the rational world, a merciless place that gave me no peace, and given access to an impossible realm where I could form an increasingly resolute relationship with the spiritual idea of my lost child.

I began to feel Arthur’s presence. I talked to him. He talked to me. I took him with me wherever I went. I toured Europe and America with the ‘In Conversations’ show and he sat with me in my dressing room, or later at night in my hotel, or he escorted me onto stage and stood there beside me. I felt emboldened by his constructed presence, or perhaps true presence — who knows? What did it matter? I felt increasingly empowered, unafraid, as I allowed him to accompany me out of my boundless grief. Sometimes, on stage, I would look out at the audience and feel a collective spiritual influence attending to everyone. It was a deeply powerful experience and testament to the restorative force of our imaginings — that child of God, that divine invention — rescuing me from my catastrophic heart and in doing so freeing himself from the convulsion of my grief.

Matti, forgive me if this makes no sense to you, but perhaps there is a way to summon your wife and dear brother and release them from your despair so that they can attend to you — allow them to become your spiritual companions in that impossible realm, to look after you in their imagined presence, and guide you forward until things get better. For they do, in time, they do.

Love, Nick


November 22, 2020 - You Can Do Anything



“The secret to change

is to focus all of your energy,

not on fighting the old,

but on building the new.”


Music by Sia.   Soundtrack to the documentary movie, ‘The Eagle Huntress’.  Reposted from April, 2020.

November 22, 2020 - Get To Know Loneliness

Sometimes you find something that makes perfect sense of how you’re feeling – and you find some relief in that …



See also The Dark Side of Social Media. Search ‘Kurzgesagt’ for more videos.


November 16, 2020 - Army of Ink Wings On Feet


Army of ink 94 wings on feet

Imagine having wings on your feet….

You’d never be trodden on again.  You’d be able to see exactly what was coming.  Where you were going.  And always have a safe place to fly up, up and away from it all.  

Footnote:   Sometimes imagining we have super powers or a super power watching over us can get us through a tough spot (Mary Poppins ‘spit, spot’ comes to mind).  Wings on feet?  Astro Boy?  Maybe it leaves her hands free?  To do what?  Take the world off her shoulders perhaps?  But there’s no world in the drawing?  Maybe others can’t see how much the weight of the world affects her – she feels it alone.   Or could it be a muscle man (woman) pose?  Flexing her muscles and being strong?  Or it could be a shrug – ‘I don’t know, don’t ask me? I don’t have all the answers.’   And with wings on her feet she’s forever safe from falling – being hurt.  Up, up and away is such a comforting thought when things get tough.

(Clunk & Jam book, 2019.  Reposted from 2014).

November 13, 2020 - The year that went STOP