My Place .
Truth is my sanctuary. A place I enter by trusting there is another place I can be. It’s slow. A little reclusive. Painful and confronting because I’m keeping company with emotions I’ve spent my life trying to escape. Vulnerable, because I’m sitting in my insecurities. Pursuing what I deeply care about. Unsettling, because life, through the eyes of truth, reveals both the beauty and the beast of it. Overwhelming, due to the acceptance of personal responsibility to create a life that soothes the pain of truth – nurtures new growth.
Lonely, from conceding that ultimately it is self-reliance that will create and secure my destiny. Sad, from accepting my past is over. Compassionate, from the realisation that I cannot effortlessly accept myself. And acknowledging the degree of consciousness it’s going to take to be content with who I am. Liberated, because the time has come to move – and from having the freedom to explore what awaits.
A stillness, from reaching a place where I feel more comfortable being different than fitting in. Where I feel a calm but intensely emotional sense of coming home.
Poem from book, ‘In My Room’. Artwork Ash Browne. Design Harley Manifold.
Tug, Tug, Tug .
The pull of the past tugged at her every attempt at a brave step away. But, alas, the counter bell in her mind rang with enlightenment….”You’re just going to have to be a touch more strategic in planning your moves and setting yourself ever so lovingly loose.” At that very moment she felt her shoulders come down from her ear lobes and life return to the balls of her feet. She was ready to go.
(Reposted from 2012. Find her in ‘Clunk & Jam’ book.)
Wish Upon A Cake .
I once wished upon stars. Books with crosses. As the white man stole birthdays. Red man pretended. Black collars wrapped around truth. Now I wear the hat that makes me taller than the glaring. Stays on as I rattle my little box. Make sticks come alive. Hard things run. Soft things dance with my breath. Spin circles that wrap all the way around me. And everything disappears .
(Clunk & Jam book, 2019. Originally in handmade book, ‘Rock The Boat’.)
They said it would be a piece of cake .
(Reposted from 2009. Now in Clunk & Jam book, 2019).
How Does Your Garden Grow .
This little soldier discovered that even though the world seemed way too BIG for her – she could create a little room for herself. And because it was just the right size, she could carry it with her so she could go all the way home wherever she went. And because it fitted her so snugly, she had to choose very carefully who she opened up to. And if they didn’t look after her things, they’d been shown nothing more than the door .
Footnote: A snail and turtle have the ability to tuck back into their shell to protect themselves – escape. There are times when we wish we could just disappear – escape too. Without a shell there are many other ways we can to this and so it’s good to make up your own ‘escape’ list. And what if when we ‘escape’ we escape into things that help us feel good about ourselves. Maybe call that list a, ‘How Does Your Garden Grow?’ list perhaps? What do you need to do to look after myself – which is not the same as selfishness by the way.
(Reposted from 2009. Original in ‘Rock The Boat’ handmade book. Now in ‘Clunk & Jam, 2019 book)
