Following the last few years I’m feeling empty and more cynical than ever. I’m losing faith in other people, and I’m scared to pass these feelings to my little son. Do you still believe in Us (human beings)?
“Hopefulness is the warrior emotion that can lay waste to cynicism. Each redemptive or loving act, as small as you like, Valerio, such as reading to your little boy, or showing him a thing you love, or singing him a song, or putting on his shoes, keeps the devil down in the hole. It says the world and its inhabitants have value and are worth defending. It says the world is worth believing in. In time, we come to find that it is so.” Full response ….
Dear Valerio,
You are right to be worried about your growing feelings of cynicism and you need to take action to protect yourself and those around you, especially your child. Cynicism is not a neutral position — and although it asks almost nothing of us, it is highly infectious and unbelievably destructive. In my view, it is the most common and easy of evils.
I know this because much of my early life was spent holding the world and the people in it in contempt. It was a position both seductive and indulgent. The truth is, I was young and had no idea what was coming down the line. I lacked the knowledge, the foresight, the self-awareness. I just didn’t know. It took a devastation to teach me the preciousness of life and the essential goodness of people. It took a devastation to reveal the precariousness of the world, of its very soul, to understand that it was crying out for help. It took a devastation to understand the idea of mortal value, and it took a devastation to find hope.
Unlike cynicism, hopefulness is hard-earned, makes demands upon us, and can often feel like the most indefensible and lonely place on Earth. Hopefulness is not a neutral position either. It is adversarial. It is the warrior emotion that can lay waste to cynicism. Each redemptive or loving act, as small as you like, Valerio, such as reading to your little boy, or showing him a thing you love, or singing him a song, or putting on his shoes, keeps the devil down in the hole. It says the world and its inhabitants have value and are worth defending. It says the world is worth believing in. In time, we come to find that it is so.
He felt so burdened by the despicable acts of others. A cutting despair at not being able to get there on time to save the suffering souls, the ice from melting, trees from falling down around the corner.
Lost in the shadow of shame, cast by human kind, knowing all too well the dread awful things that come to the weak, the marginalised, the strong – and those who resist.
He carried this burden from morning into night, until one day he woke to a different tune. In the tune he caught himself feeling his own sadness, borne from the quest to save all that felt.
Cast in his own time, he could feel every aching inch of his broken self. The closeness to his own end. Where he surrendered to the grueling battle. Stopped in time to mend.
References: ‘Hope’ painting by George Frederic Watts, 1886. With just one remaining in her lyre – she played on. Little boat reference, the movie, ‘Where the Wild Things Are’, 2009. Original childrens picture book by Maurice Sendak, 1963. Find in Clunk & Jam book.
Kindness makes a difference … and you may not receive anything in return for your kindness – but don’t let that stop you being kind. We all know how good it feels when we experience kindness. And how on a bad day, it can turn things around. Revive our faith in the world. And it’s not always obvious who’s struggling. And if you are, coming up against someone who is being unkind can feel like the last straw. And that straw isn’t always outwardly visible. So it’s just safer for everyone if we all just be kinder.
When the wild things contemplate eating Max, he tells them they can’t eat him because he’s a King. “But you’re so small.” They reply. “Small is good.” Explains Max. “My powers are able to slip right through the cracks.” “But what if the cracks are closed up?” Ask the wild things.
“Then I have a recracker which goes right through that.” “But what if they have some sort of material that recrackers can’t get through?” “Then I have a double recracker that can get through anything in this whole universe and that’s the end. And there’s nothing more powerful than that – ever. Period.”
When Max tells the wild things he can make everything right. They ask, “What about loneliness? Will you keep out all the sadness?” Max says, “I have a sadness shield, that keeps out all the sadness. It’s big enough for all of us.”
( ‘Clunk & Jam Book, 2019. Film, ‘Where The Wild Things Are’, 2009. Original story and book by Maurice Sendak, 1963. Reposted from 2011).
