Wish Upon A Billboard .
For a time when …. billboards fall flat on their perfect faces. Golden arches buckle at the knees in shame. And we’re free from going anywhere “Quick!” …”While stocks last!”….”Before it ends!” …. so we “Don’t miss out on that must have!” And fat was used to make gravy not deemed as ugly and unsightly lumps to be hidden, sucked out (and in), massaged away, jogged off, measured and cut out – or provided a menu of celebrity cooking shows for those surfing for something to escape world news.
Kids associated ‘board’ with Scrabble and not nothing to do. Offers weren’t limited and we accepted fixing wasn’t quick. Buses had people going up and down through windows not wrapped in wrinkle free banners promoting the same. Googling was staring in wonder at the sky or the sound of a blocked sink – not entry into a world that home delivers an unsavoury feast for curious young minds to consume.
A time when watching the sun sizzle into the watery horizon was a celebration of the end of another good day – not a sear on the conscience of already burdened young souls we leave to carry with them into the future. And seagulls went fishing and stopped squabbling over chips.
( ‘Clunk & Jam’ book.)
Who Holds The Mirror .
Sometimes the reason we feel so bad is because we allow others to ‘hold the mirror’. To alter how we perceive ourselves. Influence and determine how we feel. One of the hardest tasks is to be able to see and hold onto a clear and positive view of ourselves because we’re being constantly bombarded with toxic messages. An overload of choice that can tie us up in an endless spin of decision making. Add to this, the noise and the race to be and get somewhere and the fatigue all of this causes.
Question …. amidst all of this, how do we recognise and keep a firm grip on the good in ourselves? How do we maintain the energy it takes to stand firm in our own place and resist negative influences and all that makes us feel less, pulls us off course, interrupts our progress? What happens when you hold yourself still, in your own space for long enough to see through the fog and smog. What do you see? What’s real? What’s a product of your experiences and circumstances – those around you? What’s worth keeping – and what’s way passed its use by date?
(See also ‘A Date With Use-By’. Image by Harley Manifold from book, In My Room.)
January 18, 2012 - Dear Me
Dear Me . (Written November, 2011)
There is a book that poses the question … if you could write a letter to your 16 year old self, what would you say? Having experienced bullying, abuse and traumatic life experiences that left me feeling life was too unbearable to continue on, that letter might read something like this …..
You’ll get through this. You’ll survive way beyond things you believed you couldn’t. And there will be many more times when you can’t bear the thought of living another day. Another moment.
But know that it is but a moment. A moment in which you have only this desperate thought and sense of hopelessness. Moments come – and moments pass. Tomorrow may not feel a whole lot better but it can be a starting point – not the end. ‘You Can Do Anything’ video. ‘Tread Carefully In Mind’.
Links to Support.
You’ll need to take some seemingly impossible steps. Every day. Day in. Day out. And you’ll need to keep working towards change and creating a place, a life, you feel more comfortable and less despairing in. Find something that provides a sense of purpose and meaning. And you don’t necessarily have to know exactly where or what that will be. You just need to maintain the drive and determination to find it. Trusting – despite being hurt by trusting before.
And you’ll have some massive spills along the way that will lay you flat for varying lengths of time – but you’ll get up. Eventually. Every time. You’ll get up. You must. And you’ll go another round so you can at the very least, prove to yourself you can. Your weakest point will be to rely on someone else to do this work for you…
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The problem may be, we cannot imagine a future where we possess less but are more.
Art by Alex Gross . Source; Ad Busters Magazine.
Me Jane .
Dangling in a moment of vulnerability, out of her jungle mind came a thought…3 thoughts actually…Could she make it without the BOy? Did she have to take such a wild and dangerously dependent leap—after all? And was it really that difficult and frightening to just let go?
This swinging ink has layer upon layer of meaning to sit and wonder about—like…. Is she really swinging up high or is this a trick? Is her foot in fact, firmly planted on the ground? Is she clinging for her life at the mercy of the rope (or the BOy), or has she taken a firm grip to put a stop all this swinging business? And what is this swinging business about anyway? Which way is she going? Back? Forward? Nowhere right now? Or has she finally landed in her very own spot? Is the rope attached? Is it all about to uncoil leaving her in a heap? Or is it going to lift her up, whoosh her away from whatever it is she’s so afraid of right now? To be continued no doubt …..
